I’m struggling at the moment with anxiety. My anxiety is down to how busy I am professionally along with the lack of daylight in winter.

I’ve long suspected that my anxiety and depression are linked to Vit D and my mental state doesn’t usually drop until February so it’s something I need to keep a check on as it’s never usually this soon. With the days getting shorter it may be a case of upping my Vit D Tablets. I really do think I’m part bear and should hibernate at this time.

It’s probably also increased from my struggle with social cohesion , my circle of friends and family is small and its gets smaller every year. I’m not one for socialising much nor ever was. However I’m struggling as people I’m around keep demanding more from me. Am I wrong to walk when I feel that the demand for the small amount of free time is too much. Why is it that the compromise must always be me? Am I a bad person for not giving more? Or have I realised that when time is finite why should I spend effort on the activities I don’t deem important?

I honestly think if it wasn’t for my wife, daughter and dog, I could have potential to be a Hermit. I’d say Monk but I’m not religious, that looks like it takes more commitment than friends and family. That and the vestments look … Itchy.

Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.